Cohabitation can be especially wearing on a love affair. Suddenly, your sexy partner is leaving dirty socks on the floor, trying to kiss you before brushing their teeth, and walking around in the same dirty t-shirt they’ve been rocking all week.
You love your partner to death but the blaze of obsession has passed its peak and now exists as the occasional stifled flare. Living with someone can be a challenge, especially when it comes to maintaining a healthy sexual appetite. But in an effort to avoid throwing out your baby with their bath water, take a look around your collective space, and you’ll find tons of ways to improve your romance post joint-residence.
Start with wardrobe. So your partner is getting home from work and becomes immediately disrobed to put on their favorite pair of decrepit sweats. Do not pass up the opportunity to partake in the playground that is their career attire. If a belt doesn’t scream “sex” to you, perhaps a necktie or some not so sensible heels will. You don’t need to invest in tons of equipment right away to dip your feet in BDSM and see if you like it. If you are wearing the pants in the relationship, don’t be afraid to slide that belt off of your pants and around your lady’s waist as you take her from behind. If you and your partner aren’t working the grind, and each sport biz -cas threads with no tie to speak of, improvisation is key. Wait for them to get home with a light scarf at the ready to blindfold them. Sometimes even sprucing up a bit, and doing something to make you feel good (some makeup or a shave) will grab your partner’s attention the moment they walk through the door.
Household items should never be underrated. Perhaps you’ve explored with toys, regularly incorporate a healthy dose of kink and have been through the rigmarole of sexual experimentation. Open your refrigerator. You may just find some interestingly shaped/flavored items to slip in on the fly. A spatula mustn’t be reserved for heating one kind of meat, when it so closely resembles a paddle. And did it ever occur to you that those chip clip magnets that have been taking up space in your drawer could be put to much better use on your nipples?
Once you live with someone, it can be easy to neglect passionate displays of affection, as your partner can be so easily accessible. Too often does this accessibility turn into a lackadaisical approach that can veer on the side of disinterest. Relationships aren’t just about sex. But then, you’d be lying to yourself if you insisted that sexual attraction to your partner is an afterthought. Relationships are laborious affairs, but there is a reason that humans get together. And this spans beyond the performance of sexual intercourse. Attraction is more than a desire to bump uglies, but it includes a world of touch, play and physical acknowledgement that can surpass sex in the way of intimacy. Of course as time passes and relationships change, it can be difficult to maintain that stage of wonder and adoration. Months or years down the line, you may not have the intense desire you once had to lick your partner’s skin straight off of their body the moment they walk through the door. But with some creativity and a bit of effort, a long term live-in relationship can be the sexiest kind.
R. Darling
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