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Screw Valentine’s Day, the sexiest holiday is Halloween. Especially if you happen to be the kind of person who is into a guy with a penchant for biting, howling or destroying small villages. In celebration of Halloween’s horny side, checked out these haunted hunks that’ll make you scream…with delight!

Jacob Black

One of the safer choices, Jacob Black of the Twilight series probably won’t kill you (unless you are a vampire), which is always a plus. And while there is something incredibly innocent about his baby face, once this hottie goes werewolf, there’s no telling what may happen. Maybe he’ll strap you onto his back and take you for the ride of your life, or perhaps you’ll enjoy a gentle paw massage. Either way, let Edward have Bella–Jacob is sure to bring out the animal in all of us.

Frankenstein

While his body may be comprised of other dude’s parts, and he’s not much of a talker, Frankenstein wins points for being a hopeless romantic. He’ll be incredibly loyal, treat you like gold and carry you wherever you want. Plus, you can grunt all you want in the bedroom without it being awkward.  Just watch out for his rapid mood swings, and keep the guy away from picthforks and fire, and you’ll live happily ever after.

Count Dracula

The grandaddy of them all, there’s still no one around with as much bite as the original Count Dracula. His eyes will entrance you, and his fangs will make you moan with delight. And if you play your cards right, and this becomes a regular thing, you’ll get to live in a castle. Not a bad trade for donating a little blood here and there.

Patrick Bateman

While technically not a supernatural being, Patrick Bateman, the main character of American Psycho sure was a monster. Who can forget the sadistic look in his eyes as he’d hack into businessmen or chase hookers down the hallway with a chainsaw? More importantly, who can overlook those amazing abs and perfectly sculpted cheekbones? A night with Bateman will make you scream, shout and quiver. And if you’re lucky enough to make it out alive, you’ll probably masturabate to Bateman for the rest of your life.

Teen Wolf

More of a puppy than a monster, Michael J. Fox’s Teen Wolf is the kind of guy worthy of bringing home to mom and dad. Since he’s more into sinking baskets and dancing to 80′s music than ripping your face off, the only thing you’ll have to worry about is him being hypersensitive to smells, and getting a little hair in your mouth, which makes this whiskered wonder totally worth a shag.

Freddy Krueger

Okay, he’s not exactly easy on the eyes, and he can use a fashion makeover, but Freddy can sure make your dreams come true. There’s something so sexy about his deep, masculine voice and the way he likes to take control. If you like it rough, especially scratching, Freddy is the man for you. You’ll probably be bound, dragged across the floor, nailed on the ceiling, and taken to hell and back. Just be sure to agree on a safety word before things get too out of control.

Satan

The devil in the blue seat has never looked so suave as Al Pacino’s version in The Devil’s Advocate. As the master of the underworld, Satan’s got men and women lining up to bang him, so you’ll want to do your best to impress him. Maybe talk about world politics, or Lindsay Lohan–whatever it takes to pitch his fork, because sex with Satan will no doubt make you burn with passion. Just be sure not to scream “Oh, God!” while having an orgasm.

Eric Northman

The hottest of the new-breed of vampires, Eric Northman of True Blood will rip into your flesh with every part of him. He’ll belittle you, leave excessive bite marks, and probably sell you into slavery, but even death would be worth it for a taste of this Swedish delight.

Pinhead

Often overlooked, Pinhead is a monster with it all: he’ll fill your life with chaos, bring demon dogs into the bedroom, and give you acupuncture whenever you want. He’s incredibly intelligent, and more on the sensitive side, so odds are a night of love making could be easily followed by a moonlight dinner and some 19th century French poetry. If that doesn’t say romance, what does?

The Vampire Lestat

Before Tom Cruise went all scientologist crazy, he brought forth his dark side as The Vampire Lestat in the film version of Interview with the Vampire. Lestat was pure evil. He was also smoking hot and, at times, the gayest vampire alive. He’s a good choice for fashionistas, and those into nice hair. Whether you are a man or a woman, you’ll be sure to find some good-loving with Lestat.